You know what? I am doing REALLY fucking GOOD.
Every moment reveals another mystery.
I got to spend a whole week with my eyes mostly closed or away from screens. I slept. I listened to books. I did a puzzle.
I got to be a storyteller in a friend's Valentines Day performance (Plan V: Pussy Parables and Epiphanies by Eleanor Cathleen O'Brien). I didn't want to be, and I didn't prepare for it, but I did it. Laura LaDue treated me and my darling Marie Wallace to oysters and champagne beforehand. Then I went to figure out what story of my pussy I would tell. In my usual style, I got choked up and crying before a word even came out of my mouth. Luckily, the audience were all sex positive friends, so I told my story of vaginas and "Opening". I talked about the amazing way vaginas can open and close and how for me, it is so connected to my heart. It was actually fun. I love Eleanor and the work she does so much how could I NOT help her when she asked?
I did better as a doctor too. Sometimes I am so bored at work, everything so rote. But there were times this week I put away my computer and script, and just listened. I'm slowly getting better at this. Medical school doesn't teach you these skills. The combination of healing arts with the medical insurance industry is a soul killing thing. I'm working on this...it is definitely a growth edge. [I mean I am a good doctor, amazing to some, but I could be better...my boredom and dislike of the industry dampens me, as does working in Salem sometimes.)
I leaned into listening what my heart really wants. Recognized and made clear boundaries that my shadowy self would have previously crossed. I really feel that I am entering a new era.
My heartaches just had it's "reset" button pushed.
And I'M GOING TO BE A GUEST ON AN NPR PODCAST to discuss STI disclosure and the STARS Talk framework!!!!!
The show is NPR's Life Kit. This podcast is about life hacks. They are doing a new video series (will be on YouTube) in addition to their podcast- and this one is all about communication. I will be the second in the series and will air on March 28, 2023.
But the best thing that happened to me is that my son told me that I am a "great mama". If I do nothing else in my life, knowing that my children feel loved, seen, sovereign, and safe within my energy, I have succeeded.
Much love and blessings,
Feel free to reach out to me, I would love to keep in touch via Instagram @SexMedDoc and @MakeTimeForTheTalk and via Facebook @ https://www.facebook.com/evelindacker/